ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
