You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
