Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I think your dad took our porno
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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