Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Randomize
