I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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