I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
she looked like the before picture.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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