i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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