..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
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