think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
