U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Terrible idea I love it
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
