I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
