There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
