Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Someone signed my nipple.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
