I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
