spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
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