Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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