I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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