But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
