so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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