Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize