I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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