That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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