You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Randomize
