Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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