meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
