we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
