Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
The Olympian is in my bed
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
