He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize