Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
