Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
