her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize