the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
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