So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
