Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
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