that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
