I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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