I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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