I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Randomize
