He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize