One girl and one boy is just not enough.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
