hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
