your parents love me but you hate me
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
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