Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
