2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
