i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
