he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
