Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
