Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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