i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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