And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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