i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Who put my cat in the fridge?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
