is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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