you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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